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Spring Summer Fall Winter… and Spring … and will this movie end please

I don't really want to turn this into a movie review site but that apparently is the only interesting thing going on right now that I need to write about. I'm sure there's more, but upon request, I am reviewing "Spring Summer Fall Winter... and Spring".
I am not a big art house buff but I do want to expand my movie selection so I don't continue to see mindless movies that I'll eventually get sucked into anyways on a dreary Saturday afternoon this coming winter. So passing by the Angelika(which I continually want to go to but never do cuz i'm lazy), Susan and I saw a sign for SSFW&S. I've heard great things about this movie and Susan is up for anything Korean so we decided to watch it. Plus it was cold as hell and there was really nothing better to do.
But I had very high hopes for this movie since it was touted so highly. Had I been an artsy film junkie, I probably would've appreciated it, but me being me, it was long and slow and void of any appealing storyline. The movie started out slow, picked up steam in the middle - with added conflict, etc., then slowed down again to the finish - ending the movie like a first-time marathoner limping across the finish line.
Re-reading reviews of the movie and trying to figure out what I missed, I'm pretty sure it was the same movie as other reviewers watched. Again, the appeal is in the buddhist, existential story, which did not appeal to me. The movie followed closely to specific aspects of buddhism such as respect for all life, as well as atonement for sins. Scenes also commented on meditation, prayer, and how the real world affects the sanctity of the monk life.
The cinematography was awesome, with hard work clearly invested in each of the seasons, showing each environment in it's natural, distinct states. Dialogue was minimal which, while not a bad thing, brought my attention span to a minimal level as well. And somehow, the monk had these powers to close and open doors just by looking at them and summoning a rowboat from across the water with just his hand. That threw me for a loop, but who am I to argue with buddha?
This movie, if you really really want to see it, can wait for rental. The theater is not necessary for this movie and homeviewing makes it easier to get up and grab some snacks, maybe a gameboy to play, while you wait for the exciting parts of the movie.

Van Helsuck

So... just saw Van Helsing tonight up at Lincoln Center Loews thanks to my buddy Calvin and his never-ending slew of free movie screening tickets. And I must say, thank goodness it was free.

Where to begin... Well, it was a HUGE line for the movie, much like the line we stood in for the free screening of Hellboy that we eventually never got into - at least I didn't get in for free... ahem. But this looked more promising since we got the magic "green" admission ticket that supposedly guaranteed a spot in the theater. Of course, our tickets were ridiculously high, like 538-539 or something insane. So we weren't very hopeful.
But green tickets get us in and the theater is pretty much only half full, if that. A lot of the center rows were taped off for "Press" although I don't know how much freakin press there could've been. Hell, since I'm reviewing this movie here, can I be press next time? Apparently some people who were non-press before the movie started became press by movie start time as they were pulled the tape off and got to sit in press seats. Hm, I wonder how they did that.